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#4875 - 06/03/10 02:16 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
I'm still laughing... as apparently you and Aaron are... oh to have been a squirrel in the tree (as opposed to a fly on the wall)....

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#4877 - 06/03/10 02:31 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
+ @ti2d Offline


Registered: 10/22/09
Posts: 805
Loc: Oh Cursed, USA
I never saw the movie, but why does "Caddyshack" come to mind here? confused

And at half-time, the score is Chipmunk 1, Bulldog34 0...

We'll be back after a word from our sponsors...

grin
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#4878 - 06/03/10 03:32 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: + @ti2d]
Rod Offline


Registered: 09/22/09
Posts: 660
Loc: Santa Clarita, Ca. USA
Great stories Gary.I am sure that actually being there and being one of the guys makes the bear story even funnier.I have had several hillarious adventures with my buddy that are so funny we literally fall on the ground laughing when we re-tell them to each other. But we get mixed reactions when we tell the stories to others.Something about being there makes it even funnier to the participants.

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#4880 - 06/03/10 04:03 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Rod]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
Rod, there's definitely a you-had-to-be-there aspect to a lot of the story, which is why it needs a good hour of casual drinking time just to construct the framework for the real comedy. Knowing the cast of characters also goes a long way in building appreciation for it - oh my God, does it!


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#4887 - 06/03/10 09:55 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Originally Posted By: Bulldog34
That, and some "feedback" from neighboring campers, which is another chapter in itself - and was the primary reason the rangers were called in.


And dare I ask... exactly what the rangers reaction/actions were (other then the aforementioned accusation of fibbing)???

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#4893 - 06/04/10 06:02 AM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
The other campers took understandable exception to a bear being deliberately drawn to the campground, having overheard much of the animated back-and-forth after we returned from our hike.

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#4897 - 06/04/10 08:38 AM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
Rod Offline


Registered: 09/22/09
Posts: 660
Loc: Santa Clarita, Ca. USA
This story gets better and better with more background details. Love it!!!Thanks Chris for squeezing the story out of Gary.

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#4899 - 06/04/10 08:53 AM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
Steve C Offline


Registered: 09/22/09
Posts: 7235
Loc: Fresno, CA
Oh my gosh! This story just keeps going. I'm sitting here laughing ...again!

...so I have a bear and beer joke. I'll pass it along soon.


Edited by Steve C (06/04/10 08:55 AM)

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#4913 - 06/04/10 12:48 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Rod.. my pleasure.. believe me... if laughter is truely the best medicine I won't be sick for a very very long time after this story! wink I was trying to read it to my Momma the other night and couldn't barely talk I was laughing so much...

Originally Posted By: Bulldog34
So Aaron and I played dumb ("no clue, man, we were out hiking") while Terry just made stuff up as he went along (par for the course). Jose suddenly lost the ability to speak Ingles, but lost none of his natural enthusiasm ("Oso! Oso grande! Oso loco!"). ...

Later on Terry took an apologetic bottle of bourbon to the neighbors as a peace offering, and all was copacetic. It wasn't till the next day that Fouad discovered it was his Jack Black that Terry had gifted away, and he was hot as a three-dollar bill. I suppose sleeping sitting up in the cab of Terry's truck all night made him just a bit grumpy.


Ok.. so Gary.. I have this whole mental movie going on in my head narrated in a voice I'm going to assume is yours. wink You ever think of writing this story down and contributing it to one of those books that collects short stories about dumb stuff that happens in the wilderness??? You could make a fortune... start it out... "So one day.. my friend Aaron and I decided to go on a nice hike. We left Dweedle Dee, Dweedle Dum, and Dweedle Dip (actual names have been changed to protect the identities of the rocket scientests involved) at the campground to fish... Well.. after a nice little walk in the woods we returned to our campsite and OH the mess we found.... "

If you'd like my input... Dweedle Dee should be Jose... Dweedle Dum should be Terry and Dweedle Dip should be Fouad...

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#4916 - 06/04/10 02:06 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
Originally Posted By: SoCalGirl
If you'd like my input... Dweedle Dee should be Jose... Dweedle Dum should be Terry and Dweedle Dip should be Fouad...


Personally Chris, I think of them as Curly, Moe and Larry. We've all been working together for between 20 and 25 years, and we know each other like our favorite books. Aaron, sadly, accepted a transfer to Orlando a few years ago (Happy hiking there, Einstein. How'd that big 100-foot gain day work out for ya? Cumulative, that is.), but the rest of us are still here in the ATL and manage to get together every so often outside of work. No group camping or wilderness trips though - I think we burned most of the available bridges there. Terry still thinks fishing licenses are some wiseguy's form of a practical joke ("What's a brother gotta do to eat, dammit?!"), and to hear him relate his personal philosophy on the difference between whites and blacks - using a valley between two mountain ranges as the exemplary setting - is just side-splitting.

I'll see if I have some photos of these guys to post so you can put faces to names.

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#4917 - 06/04/10 02:11 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Originally Posted By: Bulldog34
I think of them as Curly, Moe and Larry. We've all been working together for between 20 and 25 years, and we know each other like our favorite books.

You need to have a reunion weekend... and set up video recording equipment. I promise not to show ANY of your wives any details of the "male bonding" experience...

Originally Posted By: Bulldog34
Aaron, sadly, accepted a transfer to Orlando a few years ago (Happy hiking there, Einstein. How'd that big 100-foot gain day work out for ya? Cumulative, that is.), ... Terry still thinks fishing licenses are some wiseguy's form of a practical joke ("What's a brother gotta do to eat, dammit?!"), and to hear him relate his personal philosophy on the difference between whites and blacks - using a valley between two mountain ranges as the exemplary setting - is just side-splitting.

Everytime I think I've heard the last, my co-workers start looking at me like I've gone off the deep end... if I'm not careful the Deputies are going to show up with the love-me jacket in a few minutes here...


Edited by SoCalGirl (06/04/10 02:11 PM)

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#4925 - 06/04/10 04:14 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Originally Posted By: Bulldog34


In his boxers... up a tree... refusing to come down until blackmailed with his clothing....

And I can TOTALLY picture Terry in a blond wig with a surfboard under his arm wagging his hand in the hang10 sign...


OOOOhhhhh my sides hurt from laughing......


Edited by SoCalGirl (06/04/10 04:17 PM)

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#4928 - 06/04/10 04:18 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
. . . and giving Allah a sharp piece of his mind. To me that was the funniest part.

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#4940 - 06/04/10 06:13 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
Originally Posted By: SoCalGirl
And I can TOTALLY picture Terry in a blond wig with a surfboard under his arm wagging his hand in the hang10 sign...


Well Chris, the will is certainly there but it's physiologically impossible. Hang Nine-and-a-Half is do-able, though. Poor Terry managed to slice off half of his thumb with a mitre saw about a year ago while building some cabinetry in his garage. Like most drama surrounding Terry, this was of his own making. Takes the guy a while to figure out what the hell that object was that came flying out of his last cut, and finally sees his thumb stuck to the ceiling.

Nonplussed, but calm, Terry goes in and tells his wife Amanda, "Hey baby, I know you got stuff to do, but we need to like, go to the hospital." He holds his hand up and she naturally freaks out. A devout power tool aficionado, while Amanda is running around finding purse and car keys, Terry goes back out to the garage and turns off his saw. Even takes the time to put the cover on. He babies his tools, but can the guy remember to maybe take his own damn thumb with him to the hospital? Hell no. Sooooo Terry.

Of course, once they get to the ER the doc wants the thumb for possible re-attachment. Terry has one of those, "I could'a had a V-8!" moments, and calls a buddy, Keith. He calmly explains the situation and asks Keith to run by his house to pick up the thumb and bring it to the hospital. "Seriously?" Keith asks. "You want me to go get your thumb and bring it to you? You're not f@#&ing with me?"

"Yeah dude. The doc like, ya know, needs it. Dude says put it on ice. Can you do it for me dude? I'd be like, ya know, really grateful. Dude, it's worth like, ya know, a 20 year-old bottle of scotch or somethin', OK? Just put the damn thing on ice like the dude said, OK? You're like, da man, dude!"

So Keith retrieves the thumb off the ceiling and finds his way to the hospital ER to deliver it. The problem is that Keith is a Type-A over-achiever. Tell him you need a tree-house built, you'll get a Swiss Family Robinson arboreum. Ask him to chill half a thumb for a 20-minute drive, he'll put the damn thing on dry ice. If you're not aware, dry ice is way colder than ice - at about fifty degrees below zero. But Keith is bound and determined that Terry's thumb is, by God, gonna be nice and cold for the doc-dude. Frozen solid and ruined, as it turns out. No re-attachment for Terry, and no 20 YO scotch for Keith. Terry said the doctor was absolutely incredulous when he opened the cooler (a fish bait cooler, at that - thanks, dude) and found the severed thumb 100% frostbitten on the dry ice.

But hey, that's the kinda crap that seems to only happen to Terry. Sorry to drift so far off topic, Chris, but your "Hang Ten" comment immediately percolated that story up in my memory, and I thought you'd appreciate it. Got to hear Terry tell that for the umpteenth time last week, so it was fresh.

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#4941 - 06/04/10 06:20 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
quillansculpture Offline


Registered: 11/13/09
Posts: 552
Loc: Murrieta, CA
So....Gary, Does it feel kind of weird that you know TWO guys with 9 1/2 digits? Or Two guys with a half a thumb?
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#4943 - 06/04/10 06:43 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: quillansculpture]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
Originally Posted By: quillansculpture
So....Gary, Does it feel kind of weird that you know TWO guys with 9 1/2 digits? Or Two guys with a half a thumb?


I knew that was coming! When we're climbing Whitney, just say "dude" a lot and I'll feel right at home.

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#4945 - 06/04/10 07:42 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
Mike Condron Offline


Registered: 11/05/09
Posts: 215
Loc: Now Manteca, CA
I haven't laughed out loud for a while.
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Mike

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#4948 - 06/04/10 10:50 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Mike Condron]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Holy Crap Gary... you're killin' me here Dude. I haven't laughed this much in awhile...

When are you and Joe gonna be in the Whitney area? I might just have to make sure DougSr has a couple of nice cold brewskis waiting for you...

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#4953 - 06/05/10 04:33 AM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: SoCalGirl]
Bulldog34 Offline


Registered: 11/12/09
Posts: 1254
Loc: Atlanta
Originally Posted By: SoCalGirl
Holy Crap Gary... you're killin' me here Dude. I haven't laughed this much in awhile...

When are you and Joe gonna be in the Whitney area? I might just have to make sure DougSr has a couple of nice cold brewskis waiting for you...


"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people" - one of my favorite quotations.

My family and I are in the Mammoth area July 9-14, then down to LP the 14th-17th. Joe and I plan to head up Whitney the 15th and down the 16th (Friday), assuming permits can be had. We have beers reserved at Gary's campsite (+ @ti2d) that Friday afternoon after we come down, and plan to treat a certain Moose to a WPS burger and a beer that same evening if she's not off conquering the state of Nevada, or something similar. Then, long after Joe opens up the bar on his dime, my darling wife will chauffeur my undoubtedly skunked ass down to the Hostel to sleep it off while my daughter chastises me endlessly for drinking too much (I allow myself only a couple of get-hammered nights a year - I suspect 7/16 will be my inaugural for 2010).

Saturday the 17th we're just hangin' out at the Portal to watch and photograph the bears. Joe's bringing the Porterhouse steaks and I'm bringing the beer.

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#4960 - 06/05/10 09:04 PM Re: A Walk in the Woods . . . [Re: Bulldog34]
SoCalGirl Offline


Registered: 12/06/09
Posts: 225
Loc: Spring Valley, CA
Well... I can't promise I'll be able to drag myself up from SoCal... but I will most definately make arrangements for a couple of drinks on me... I have a couple of connections in the area wink

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