The teacher left her aide in the classroom to distribute the examination materials to the graduating class of the all-male private school. Her final instructions were "Be sure to *hand* everything out very carefully and deliberately." The aide puzzled over this for a moment, but couldn't understand it.

He began giving out the papers, but due to his inexperience found himself only a quarter done with just a few minutes left until the exam was due to start. Desperate, he gathered up the rest of the sheets and began to throw them across the room, yelling "Catch!" to each student as he did so. At first it was kind of a playful game, but soon he noticed that even the students not involved in the sport were beginning to breath heavier. As the panting turned into grunting, he began to be a little nervous and backed toward the door, staring from side to side as the behavior became more and more -- the only word he could think of -- primitive.

As he reached the bottom of the pile of papers and pitched it to the last student, the room erupted with howling and growling. He was certain he could see the students physically transforming before his eyes. With a shout of fright he turned and ran as quickly as he could to the teachers' lounge.

The teacher took one look at him and leaped to her feet. Startled, he put a hand to his face and, with a shock, felt a heavy growth of beard that certainly hadn't been there that morning.

Without a word, the teacher rushed from the room, grabbing her aide's wrist on the way by. Frantically, they sprinted back to the classroom. As they rounded the corner, they saw that they were too late. The door had been torn from its hinges and they glimpsed the hairy back of the missing-link-like creature that, until mere minutes before, had been a student with at least a veneer of civilization. They entered the classroom side by side and stopped dead, as though choreographed. The destruction was complete: desks smashed into fragments, blackboards cracked, shredded sheets of the exam everywhere.

She said nothing, but the teacher's eyes were full of reproach.

"But why did it happen?" asked the bewildered assistant.

"You idiot, Don't you know what happens to men when they get too much test tossed around?"

Verum audaces non gerunt indusia alba. - Ipsi dixit MCMLXXII