Poor old Grandad's passed away, cut off in his prime,
He never had a day off crook - gone before his time.
We found him in the dunny, collapsed there on the seat,
A startled look upon his face, his pants around his feet.

The doctor said his heart was good - fit as any trout,
The Constable, he had his say, 'foul play' was not ruled out.
There were theories at the inquest of snakebite without trace,
Of red backs quietly creeping and death from outer space.

No one had a clue at all - the judge was in some doubt,
When Dad was called to have his say as to how it came about.
'I reckon I can clear it up,' said Dad with trembling breath,
'You see it's quite a story - but it could explain his death.'

'This here exploration mob had been looking at our soil,
And they reckoned that our farm was just the place for oil,
So they came and put a bore down and said they'd make some trials.
They drilled a hole as deep as hell, they said about three miles.

Well, they never found a trace of oil and off they went, post haste,
And I couldn't see a hole like that go to flamin' waste.
So I moved the dunny over it - real smart move I thought,
I'd never have to dig again - I'd never be 'caught short'.

The day I moved the dunny, it looked a proper sight,
But I didn't dream poor Grandad would pass away that night.
Now I reckon what has happened - poor Grandad didn't know
The dunny was re-located when that night he had to go.

And you'll probably be wondering how poor Grandad did his dash ..
Well, he always used to hold his breath
Until he heard the splash!!

Note: Found this attributed to "Unknown Author". Since found this:

"Credit to the author Grahame Watt, who is my grandfather, otherwise known within the bush poetry world as 'Skewiff Watty' The correct title of the poem is actually 'Poor Old Grandad!' and the poem was written and published in his book of the same name, 'Poor Old Grandad' released in 2001.

If there is interest in his work he is certainly happy to be contacted directly if required at skewiff80@npes.net.au."

Last edited by wagga; 10/20/13 07:24 PM. Reason: Attribution
Verum audaces non gerunt indusia alba. - Ipsi dixit MCMLXXII